odinochka | IC CONTACT

Hey. I told you lots of personal hypothetical information. Was that stupid?

[…] How so?

It would be better if you did not do anything that puts strain on your arm, including sleeping on hard surfaces.

No, sorry. I did not express myself correctly. What I meant was my idea to make you take a quiz, my initiation, that was stupid. Your responses were not stupid. [...] I had fun.

I'm confused about why you are confused. Lundegaard is where we live. We made this place. Physically it represents our commitment to keep each other safe and shelter one another. [...] Even when no one cares that I am gone, I will still miss you and seek to return to you.

The hay was supposed to be my soft surface.

No, it was not stupid. I had fun too.

I did not know you felt that way. I thought you wanted the whole Quad to be one. And why are you saying 'when' like you have plans to be gone?

Not soft enough. And too cold. I am sorry. I really should not have let you sleep there while you were recovering. [...] I do not know what I was thinking. I am coming to you, but only to bring you back to your house. So pack your things.

[...] I didn't want to assume. And then your nose started bleeding, and I thought I should let you rest.

I do think we should all come together. But Lundegaard will always be special. These beliefs are not contradictory to me. And I used "when" because it already happened and would happen again if I were made to stay at Prescott.

Then where will you stay?

It is hard to tell sometimes whether you are doing things for me or for you. But I suppose the result is the same in the end and we should not worry so much about it.

Is this about your sister?

Somewhere perfectly adequate. I do not know yet. Please do not worry about it.

I probably should not do things for me.

Partially. [...] But what I am talking about is prideful and self-centered. I should be satisfied with what I have, or be earnest about changing myself to live how I want.

[...] [...] [...] What if I slept on the floor, and you didn't leave? I'm very quiet. And I'll leave early in the mornings anyway, to get started on my work. Once the wind farm is cleared of zombies, I'll leave even earlier. You won't notice me.

How do you expect to live the life you want if you do not do things for yourself? Think about that for a moment.

[…]

Do you want me to stay with you, John?

Sometimes I get things I want. I am satisfied.

[…] It depends on what you want. […] But when we were in the storage locker, although I thought we might die, I also felt safe together. […] And if something happens to my hand again tonight I will have to come find you anyway and if you are searching for another place to stay while I am searching for you that is not as efficient, and anyway it is more efficient for you to stay there because then neither of us have to move much of our things.

You do not seem satisfied but maybe that is none of my business.

[…] I want to stay, […] but I am taking the floor. Is your hand still completely numb or is some feeling returning?

*I am learning to be satisfied.

~~No, I will take the floor~~ […] I just hit my hand against the floor and my thumb somewhat hurts. That’s good, right?

Is this the life you want to live though?

That is good. But please be careful with your hand while it is without feeling. I am going to stop by the infirmary for a few things.

Why are you asking? It doesn’t affect you. Do you get what you want, Maggie? Are youyou satisfied?

Okay. […] My pointer and my middle finger are back now too.

There is no need to be sharp with me. If you do not want to talk to me about these things, you can just say so.

That is very good. Try to gently stretch your shoulder joint the way you do for me.

The way you and Nat phrase things sometimes, it’s like you think I’m a child who either doesn’t know how to live or who hasn’t thought about life intelligently. Maybe you think you are being kind and helpful to me but I know how this goes. Very few people have the patience to continue talking to an adult they think is a child. And answer my questions.

I would like us to better understand each other. They are called probing questions. I am probing.

And of course I am not satisfied. Although I am trying to be kinder, more optimistic, grateful. It is just not always easy thing to do.

I have lost sensation in my hand and you are trying to probe me. What’s the expression? Take me out to dinner first.

I am bringing you back to my place, isn’t that enough?

[…] ~~IT’S MY PLACE~~ It’s my place.

That I want you to live in for the time being.

Cohabitating while completely unaffecting one another.

Obviously we can have conversations. And I intend to modify my schedule to provide you with the most time alone in the house that I can manage.

It’s just not conducive to anything if you say to me, “Think about that for a moment” as you “probe.” That’s like smacking my ~~NUMB~~ numb hand with a ruler.

Maybe I just really wanted you to do something nice for yourself in that moment.

Politely, respectfully, and without malice, there’s no good reason for me to do anything like that.

And the next probe will be of you.

Alright, I understand. I will stop. Sorry.

[…] […] Now come and save me please. C]:^)

DM, 11/19

odinochka Margarita Son - Date: 2024-11-21 12:51 am (UTC) - Expand

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only