I thought maybe Dutch but then I saw that she had a frog, so I knew it was you.
Today will be the worst day, so I am glad you are feeling relatively well. My fever is too high. I think I will be here for some time. And it would be nice to see him. Thank you, John.
Yes, self-taught. When I had my accident, I spent some time in the hospital. My blood was contaminated—burnt, essentially—so I had to get it all replaced. Then I was home bound for a time. I got bored and one of the nurses gave me a DIY magazine. […] And it’s not for a mean reason. Spiders are not well understood but are necessary for […] comfortable living. There is also a particular elegance to them. […] And I suppose I wanted you to be impressed. I acted on a bad impulse.
I led us down two dead ends. Necessarily I must bear a good portion of the blame, if not all of it.
It was a few years ago, I would hope by now all of my present blood is entirely my own. But for a while yes, I had someone else's blood.
[...]
You know, I do not actually want you to move out when we return to Lundegaard. You can continue to stay in my house. I was sleeping in the barn before our mission, so you're not inconveniencing Ophelia.
Ah, so that is why you have had hay in your hair lately. I thought maybe you were going there to meet someone. But it is okay. I will find somewhere else to stay, I won’t camp. You are being kind but I have overstayed my welcome.
To be frank with you, I felt like the entire experience of being electrocuted filled me with the Holy Spirit. But my mother hated when I said that.
I mean I am asking you to stay. That is my preference. Unless you no longer want to. [...] Also I am going to pretend as though you did not insinuate you thought I would stoop to [...] barnyard follies. I am 31. I comport myself with control like all other grown-ups. Please.
When I had Black Fever for the first time, I had a similar thought. I imagined something purifying was burning me clean from the inside.
[…] No, it is not that I don’t want to stay. Only that I cannot let you sleep in the barn. And I was not meaning to be judgmental. People respond in all sorts of ways when they are confronted with their own mortality.
If I didn't know any better, I'd say you, Margarita Son, are projecting. So if you'd like to confront your mortality on a nightly basis elsewhere, don't let me stop you. But I don't mind the barn.
You were bitten before I was. You should have been worrying about yourself. And if you aren't being funny, why am I now laughing?
[...]
A rhetorical question. Do you feel the lucidity of rage or should I take a different tack? That was a genuine laugh, by the way. It's a bit funny to message you in silence, directly opposite your cot.
John gets up from his cot and walks carefully over to Maggie’s. He’s stymied for a moment when he realizes there is no convenient place to sit next to her.
“Please move. Thank you.”
Awkwardly, without ceremony, he sits on the edge of her cot.
“I have ‘Does he really like you?’, ‘Are you insecure?’, ‘Are you a sucker?’, ‘Is it like, lust, or love?’, and ‘Are you cool with your mom?’”
Maggie opens one eye and peeks out to assess the quality of John’s indignation. She determines that he doth protest just the right amount for someone who is telling the truth.
“Alright, alright. I believe you. Let’s find out if I am a sucker, I guess.”
“A guy you have never spoken to in your life asks to borrow five bucks. You say: - Back off, punk! - Is it an emergency? How do I know I will ever get it back? -Sure. But I only have a ten. Pay me back when you get the chance.”
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Intra-Bite Ward delivery, 11/12
DM, 11/12
DM, 11/12
I think I am well enough to be discharged soon. If I’m discharged before you, I’ll bring your cat to visit.
DM, 11/12
Today will be the worst day, so I am glad you are feeling relatively well. My fever is too high. I think I will be here for some time. And it would be nice to see him. Thank you, John.
DM, 11/12
[…] Can I do anything for you, to make you more comfortable? […] It’s my fault you are feeling this way.
DM, 11/12
No, it is not your fault. You can talk to me though. It helps me stay lucid.
DM, 11/12
I led us down two dead ends. Necessarily I must bear a good portion of the blame, if not all of it.
DM, 11/12
Well, I do not blame you. You saved my life, in the end. Besides, you cannot take credit for my excessive immuno response. That is all me.
DM, 11/12
[...]
You know, I do not actually want you to move out when we return to Lundegaard. You can continue to stay in my house. I was sleeping in the barn before our mission, so you're not inconveniencing Ophelia.
DM, 11/12
Ah, so that is why you have had hay in your hair lately. I thought maybe you were going there to meet someone. But it is okay. I will find somewhere else to stay, I won’t camp. You are being kind but I have overstayed my welcome.
DM, 11/12
I mean I am asking you to stay. That is my preference. Unless you no longer want to. [...] Also I am going to pretend as though you did not insinuate you thought I would stoop to [...] barnyard follies. I am 31. I comport myself with control like all other grown-ups. Please.
DM, 11/12
[…] No, it is not that I don’t want to stay. Only that I cannot let you sleep in the barn. And I was not meaning to be judgmental. People respond in all sorts of ways when they are confronted with their own mortality.
DM, 11/12
If I didn't know any better, I'd say you, Margarita Son, are projecting. So if you'd like to confront your mortality on a nightly basis elsewhere, don't let me stop you. But I don't mind the barn.
DM, 11/12
You, John Hwang, are the one doing a funny sort of projecting.
DM, 11/12
You’re the one who’s funny.
DM, 11/12
I am not being funny.
DM, 11/12
[...]
A rhetorical question. Do you feel the lucidity of rage or should I take a different tack? That was a genuine laugh, by the way. It's a bit funny to message you in silence, directly opposite your cot.
DM, 11/12
We are having a private conversation.
[…]
I still feel crazy. But that is better than feeling nauseous and fatigued, I suppose.
DM, 11/12
I can read you a Seventeen magazine quiz if you’d like to feel crazy in a different way.
DM, 11/12
11/12, bite ward
“Please move. Thank you.”
Awkwardly, without ceremony, he sits on the edge of her cot.
“I have ‘Does he really like you?’, ‘Are you insecure?’, ‘Are you a sucker?’, ‘Is it like, lust, or love?’, and ‘Are you cool with your mom?’”
11/12, bite ward
“You are being mean.”
11/12, bite ward
“These are the quizzes.”
He brandishes the magazine at her. The cover, which had featured Taylor Lautner, is missing.
“I cannot make this up.”
11/12, bite ward
“Alright, alright. I believe you. Let’s find out if I am a sucker, I guess.”
11/12, bite ward
“A guy you have never spoken to in your life asks to borrow five bucks. You say:
- Back off, punk!
- Is it an emergency? How do I know I will ever get it back?
-Sure. But I only have a ten. Pay me back when you get the chance.”
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